Be Your Own Advocate

All to often we leave our doctors appointment with our head spinning trying to make sense of what the doctor just told us. Is the pain that I am feeling really all in my head? Am I imagining it all? She must think I'm crazy! I must be because the doctor says that I'm fine, "make an appointment with me for your physical next year" she says as she pats me on the shoulder and leaves the room.

Blood tests and other scans confirm that I'm "within normal limits" and the letter telling me so says that if I have any questions that I should contact the office. I should feel happy that I'm healthy but I am not. I'm disappointed that my tests are normal because I'm tired of feeling pain for no supposed reason.

So where do I go from here? I feel in my gut that something isn't right. I experience this pain everyday. It is real to me and it affects everything that I do in my daily life. For me it's a quality of life issue. I can manage the pain at times but I don't want to use over-the-counter medications on a daily basis. Complimentary medicine helps but it does not fix the root of the pain. I want to find the source of the pain so that I know if and how I can treat it. I don't want to just managing the pain.

I now understand why so many people get addicted to pain medications. When you are in chronic pain and you can't find help from a doctor you start to question yourself. When the pain worsens, your mood worsens as well. You're not the person you used to be because you don't function the way you used to. You don't feel supported by the medical community and possibly your family and friends if they can't relate so you become anti-social. Pain meds are the only things that bring some type of normalcy.

I'm writing about this to encourage those of you who are in chronic pain to become your own advocate and not give up on yourself. Your pain is real. If you feel something that is not right and your physician is telling you everything is fine, don't give up until you are satisfied with the results. I know that health insurance and finances may limit some of the things that you can do but it can't limit your research and it can't limit you reaching out to others for support. You are not in this a lone. There are so many of us in the same situation.

When I say be your own advocate I want to stress that you should not give up on your self at the expense of another persons opinion. Listen to your body. You know your self and your body better than any body else does. If you know that something is not right, don't give up searching until you find out what the problem is. Open your mind to the possibilities when considering why something might be happening. Start a journal. Write down everything you do for a minimum of a month so that you can track what you are doing. What are you eating? Are you exercising? Where are you spending your time? How are you feeling during that time? Be the detective on your own case. Look at your own family history. Have you ever filled out a lengthy family history form for a new doctors appointment only to be taken back before you were done and the nurse says "don't worry we'll get that from you after the doctor sees you"? Duh, wouldn't you think the doc should look at it before he saw you??????

Once you have gathered all of your journal information, family history, your symptoms and narrowed it all down. Research any possibilities. Educate yourself on any of the suspected injuries or illnesses that you think you might have. Then make your appointment with the appropriate doctor. Have it with your supporting documentation. Your journals - family history and questions. Ask specific questions about the injury or illness you suspect. Ask for the tests that relate to it and then ask about treatment. Don't back down and consider a second opinion.

In regards to pain control, I don't feel like people should have to be in pain but I don't believe people should be over medicated either. I believe that we should always find and fix the source of pain instead of just covering up the pain with medication. If we can't or won't find the source of pain then I think we should use alternative methods for pain relief as much as possible and then supplement with pain meds when necessary. My biggest gripe is when people can't get help finding why they are having pain and are told nothing is wrong or are just told to pop a pill and get over it. My second biggest gripe is when people who are not in pain expect people who are in chronic pain to "deal with it" and my third biggest gripe is that people in chronic pain are supposed to look like they are in pain. Apparently if you look good on the outside you can't be suffering on the inside. Note to self: When your head is going to explode don't take a bath, wear no make-up, don't comb hair and wear dirty clothes. Correction, I believe that most chronic pain sufferers still function and do it quite well. It's just behind closed doors is when they break down or have to recover from the days activities and have to prepare to do it all again the next.

Thank you for listening to my gripes. My main message is to PLEASE BE YOUR OWN ADVOCATE! (can you tell I feel strongly about this?)